Consider Yourself

What do you do throughout your day that is strictly for YOUR happiness? I’ve been ruminating on this question for a while now and there are moments where I feel like I’ve gone weeks without doing something for myself. I have a personality that is driven by serving others, and while I am energized by putting smiles on other people’s faces, it can be draining to constantly be thinking about other people, never considering what I want.

I’m a sensitive person, and what I mean by sensitive is that I am able to feel what another person is feeling just by taking a quick glance at them. I view this as a gift but this gift has its detriments. One detriment is that I apologize to people for something that had no real affect on their day, but I make up a story in my head that says differently. Sometimes it feels like I am constantly thinking about other people. I think about what other people are thinking about me. I think about what other people are saying about my actions. It’s interesting because this is somewhat of an egotistical trait because I just assume that people take time out of their day to think about me, like dude, everyone has their own shit going on, and making up some story in my head isn’t helping anyone, and it only weighs me down. So I ask myself, what does considering what I want or what I need look like?

Well, sometimes I just need a break from people. Sometimes I just need silence, and I shouldn’t feel guilty about that just because I could be making someone else’s day with that time, or because someone wants to see me and I may have to disappoint someone to get what I want. I guess that is what I’m scared of ultimately. I’m scared of disappointing other people with my actions, but there is no way that I can please everyone all the time. I need to accept the fact that when I prioritize myself, I am going to disappoint other people sometimes.

I got a little side tracked there, but part of the reason why writing is so therapeutic for me is because I am able to process some of the issues I face on the day to day. Writing is something I do for myself. Walking is something I do for myself. Meditation is something I do for myself. I want you to think about what you do throughout your day that is strictly to make you happy. It could be as simple as making a cup of coffee in the morning. Whatever that thing is, set aside 5-10 minutes to invest into that activity, and slowly work your way up. What you may find as well is that things you think you do for yourself is really to make other people happy, and you might be happier without it. You have to consider yourself. You will burnout if you don’t. You need to recharge your batteries every now and then.

With Love,

Luke